(Day 25 of the Fanfiction series.)
It was the first day of the last week of Heechul’s fanfiction challenge. The members were ecstatic and, yet, found themselves reading even more fanfiction than earlier in the challenge. Eunhyuk was at the radio station that evening with Eeteuk, of course, and they had Ryeowook and Hankyung as guests to represent SJ-M.
Before the show began, Eunhyuk was swinging right and left in his chair, his expression considering as he silently watched the members present. He waited until they were the only ones in the recording room before he spoke up,
“Hey, since my last complaint was for the entire group,” Eunhyuk began, ignoring the scowl from Eeteuk, “Can I make another one?”
“That would only bring your complaints to two,” Hankyung commented,
“If it helps, this complaint isn’t from me. Well, it is, but the idea didn’t come from me, it came from Junsu and then it became a complaint from me as well,” Eunhyuk explained.
“What is it?” Ryeowook inquired as he looked up from the sheet music he was using to prepare for a radio performance,
“All those SJ-DBSK fanfictions,” Eunhyuk said, “Just because we’re all friends, it doesn’t mean we think of each other in that way. You’d think the writers would keep ships within the groups, but no, all it takes is to be someone’s friend and it causes a ship!”
“That’s like your previous complaint,” Ryeowook realized, “Your past complaint about being unable to have friends because writers assume too much –”
“Tablo-hyung’s too busy to message me back,” Eunhyuk murmured,
“– so does this count as a complaint on its own?” Ryeowook looked at Hankyung.
The Chinaman blinked, “I… How would I know? I’m not Heechul.”
“Yes, but Heechul’s not here so, you’re his representative,” Ryeowook explained matter-of-factly,
“If he wasn’t Ryeowook, he’d call you Heechul’s bitch,” Eeteuk said solemnly as he pulled on a set of headphones, “No more talking about you-know-who’s you-know-what. The show’s about to begin.”
“You calling it that, only makes it seem worse than it actually is,” Eunhyuk stated as it was Hankyung’s turn to glare at the leader.
The members went on with the show as usual. However, Eeteuk realized almost immediately that Eunhyuk was more timid and withdrawn. When the first commercial break happened, Eeteuk slid his headphones off, hanging them off his neck and turned in his seat to look at Eunhyuk,
“Can you please do your job?” Eeteuk scolded in his leader-tone.
“Yes, mother,” Eunhyuk said mockingly,
“Aw, you’re finally acknowledging the family! I knew after Kangin started the rest of you would fall in also!” Eeteuk beamed,
Eunhyuk rolled his eyes as he looked back at Ryeowook, “You know what, I’ve been thinking and this complaint gets its own complaint!”
Ryeowook blinked, taking a moment to remember what he was talking about and then, “Why? It’s the same complaint.”
“Because this isn’t just any complaint, it’s a DBSK-related complaint. Therefore, it gets its own complaint,” Eunhyuk huffed,
“I beg to differ,” Hankyung said, falling in with Ryeowook,
“And about 800 000 people would disagree with you both,” Eunhyuk countered, folding his arms over his chest,
Hankyung paled and glanced at Ryeowook, “ELFs are growing in number but… should we borrow some S♥NE?”
Ryeowook shook his head, eyes wide, “No, some of them don’t like us… how about different companies? We could borrow some VIPs?”
“No, that’s just causing unnecessary cross-company trouble,” Hankyung replied. He pulled out his phone, dialled and held it to his ear, “Heechul? I want to ask you something. What? No, I don’t care what you’re wearing. No, no, I didn’t mean it like that!”
The members watched as Hankyung’s face flushed profusely,
“No, no, I wanted to ask if you could call Yunho for me since I’m at the radio station,” Hankyung said, “Me and Ryeowook need some support so Yunho can give us some Cassiopeia.”
Eunhyuk’s jaw dropped, “You can’t do that! You’re the ones who were against DBSK!”
“Don’t say that so loud!” Ryeowook cried anxiously, glancing around to make sure no one heard, “You know that fanatics are worse than writers!” Ryeowook shuddered visibly, “Even worse is when a fanatic takes up writing!”
“No I am not trying to be a gigolo, we’re just having an argument with Eunhyuk,” Hankyung hissed into the phone,
Eunhyuk grew frantic as the commercial break was close to finishing and Hankyung was still talking to Heechul to gain Yunho’s aid. Finally, he turned in his chair to the leader.
Eeteuk blinked, “You never call me that. What do you want?”
“I need your help,” Eunhyuk said, “I know you’ve been contacting Jaejoong more often this month and with you’re help and me contacting Junsu, we can beat Hankyung and Ryeowook.”
“Ryeowook? Why do we want to beat him? He’s Ryeowook!” Eeteuk gushed as if he were talking about a cute kitten (perhaps a baby raccoon).
“Have you forgotten everything Yesung has told us about Ryeowook?” Eunhyuk questioned,
“I try not to think of it,” Eeteuk sniffed as Ryeowook cried, “What does Yesung say!?”
“See, hyung, he’s being aggressive again,” Eunhyuk hissed,
“I AM NOT!” Ryeowook defended,
“And he’s yelling,” Eunhyuk shook his head, “Him and Hankyung are enlisting the help of Yunho, so we have to get Jaejoong and Junsu –”
Eeteuk suddenly smacked Eunhyuk upside the back of his head.
“What was that for!?” Eunhyuk cried,
“You’ve been a bad influence on them!” Eeteuk answered, “Don’t teach them your homewrecker-ways!”
Eunhyuk’s jaw dropped in astonishment.
“Don’t talk on the phone when I’m talking to you,” Eeteuk scolded Hankyung.
Hankyung blinked, glanced at Eunhyuk who was still silently shocked before looking back at Eeteuk, “But… I’m talking to Heechul.”
“I don’t care, it’s still rude,” Eeteuk said matter-of-factly,
“Hyung… it’s Heechul,” Hankyung stressed, his hand over the mouthpiece,
“You three should be ashamed of yourselves,” Eeteuk shook his head, eyes narrowed, “Trying to cause strife between your Aunt and Uncle,” he looked at Eunhyuk, “Even bringing your cousin into this!”
Eunhyuk, “My what?”
“Aunt and Uncle?” Ryeowook questioned, “Yunho-hyung and Jaejoong-hyung?”
Eeteuk nodded as he looked back at Eunhyuk, “And you, stop being a bad influence! You’ll get your cousin mixed up in your shenanigans and so help me Eunhyuk, if Jaejoong calls me crying because Junsu’s gotten into all kinds of crazy –”
“HE’S THE ONE WHO COMPLAINED TO ME FIRST!” Eunhyuk whined angrily,
“That’s it, when we go back to the dorms you are to go to your room without dinner,” Eeteuk sniffed, turning forward in his seat and crossing his arms.
Eunhyuk blinked, looking at Hankyung and Ryeowook helplessly, “Can… Can he do that?”
“He has Kangin,” Ryeowook stated with wide eyes,
“Yes but…” Eunhyuk trailed off hesitantly, “But… Cassiopeia?”
Ryeowook said solemnly, “You can ask for their help, but Kangin knows where you sleep at night.”
(Day 26: In the Club)